'Oh yes I know that only too well' I hear you say.
Well here's the 'Fresh' rub on it: -
Now you are gonna have to really think about this and I mean really!
So let’s say someone you care about has said or done ( or is doing) something that hurt you, that makes you feel wounded inside, you can’t stop going back to it in your mind. The little hurt person inside of you keeps on saying 'why?' . Well first of all let’s look at that, every time you relive it, question it, visit it, you are fueling that hurt, like scratching the scab off and not letting it heal~ ' Yeah I know that, but it can’t stop!' you say. Let me tell you something you can and some of you WILL.
It really is this simple.
You can visit the situation once more but this time we are going to take the adult, grown up with us to visit. If and only if, the adult part of you can HONESTLY and truly say, MY ACTIONS, MY WORDS were and are all out of love, good intent and INTEGRITY then quite simple the others person’s response is SIMPLY THEIR STUFF, their responsibility and their issues. Now I’m not saying this means you cannot take responsibility for your own actions. But truly when you can say I DID NOTHING WRONG, I DID NOTHING TO DESERVE THIS then the actions causing you pain really do belong to SOMEONE ELSE. So now we can say, hey, their journey their stuff, I can stay or I can go, I can disconnect from any further pain as I KNOW it really is about them NOT ME!!!
We CAN remove those anchors that keep us imbedding the hurt in the little child in us. So feeding him or her it’s time for her to grow up too, to understand that not every action we receive is actually about us! Give that little child in you the power to grow up now! You CAN DO THIS! Your Adult person knows this and just like any child sometimes you just have to keep telling the same thing over and over again and showing them by example the right way to behave. Tell that child, ' Now you know you did nothing wrong, you know you are good and kind and giving and loving, this stuff is about them not you, now forget it and go play with someone else who is fun to be with'
After all most children don’t continue to play with the bullies forever they - they learn to go play with people who are good.
Anchors Away my friends, set them free to play nicely now, let those with troubles, keep their troubles to themselves and MOST OF ALL DON’T GIVE THEM ROOM TO MOVE THEIR TROUBLES INTO YOUR HEAD!!