There is nothing to be gained in hiding behind your fear. There is nothing to be gained but wrapping yourself in guilt and sadness. And everything to be gained in releasing it so that you can take that leap of faith and build your wings on the way down. There is no shame in laughter, no shame in wanting to allow the light back in. ~J.V. Manning A few years back a friend gave me a bookmark. On it was a picture of an angel and the quote from Kobi Yamada; "Sometimes you need to take a leap of faith and build your wings on the way down". This quote that has stuck with me all these years. Usually popping into my head when I am in the process of talking myself out of doing or starting something that could potentially change my life. Why are we more often our own worst enemy instead of our own very best friend? Fear. Fear of change, happiness, failure or whatever we can conjure up in our minds, which give us an excuse to put the brakes on life's possibilities. If we never take that step then we will never fall flat on our face. We fear the unknown and therefore block ourselves from learning something new before we even get started. We fear letting go of the past and moving on. So we block ourselves and get creative with excuses to justify it. Trying to convince not only the world but ourselves that it is the right decision to not take that leap. But it is not just changing that so many are afraid of or trying new things. People fear life itself. They do not trust in it, in their happiness, their abilities or the future. They fear moving on from the past. They fear moving on from love lost, relationships that have ended, their grief or their memories. Simply because moving on from these things will lead them into the great unknown where they could get hurt again and open themselves up to feeling emotions that they long ago sealed off in self preservation. So they draw protective shields around themselves and plant their feet and shroud their life in sadness, grief, anger and frustrations- because these are the only things they trust and believe in. You become a prisoner of your circumstance. Denying yourself the freedom of releasing it all and taking a leap of faith so that you can move on and be happy. Move on and allow the light back into your life. You say that you can't. That it is too soon or that you could never open yourself up to the chance. The chance of losing again or exposing yourself to the possibility of getting hurt. You allow the darkness of your fear to take over while holding the key to the chains that bind you the whole time. You are not helping yourself. You are not protecting yourself. You are only short changing yourself. There is nothing to be gained in hiding behind your fear. There is nothing to be gained but wrapping yourself in guilt and sadness. And everything to be gained in releasing it so that you can take that leap of faith and build your wings on the way down. There is no shame in laughter, no shame in wanting to allow the light back in. There is no shame in saying your peace once and for all to what has hurt you, taken away your life and rendered you a shell of who you once were. By saying good bye to it and making peace once in for all with what has happened to you, you turn that key on the lock to the chains that bind you. You begin releasing your fear and you begin making that turn to the light. The light of your tomorrow. It is scary releasing your sadness and shrugging off your fear and moving forward. You believe in your sadness and trust in your fear because it feels right. The worst has happened and by not moving on from it, it can't happen again. You hold tight to your feelings of guilt and scoff that you could ever be happy. You have lost so much. It would be a disservice to the one that died. You cringe at the thought of loving again- once burned twice shy. You trust more in the bad that has happened then you ever could in the future of possibilities. Seriously. Enough. Your relationship ended. Probably badly and you have more "love" wounds than you care to admit. Or you lost someone that you loved so much, whose death has rendered your heart empty. You will never smile or feel whole again, you say to yourself. And you won't if you keep stopping yourself. Release it. Once and for all. Allow the light back in to your life. Unlock the chains that bind you and LEAP! Release your fear of the unknown and make room in your heart and your life for happiness. Trust that while bad happens- good does too. Know how I know that? Because when you release the fear- You put good back into to the world by simply being a part of it. Take that leap of faith and build your wings on the way down. You will fly before you know it.
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