The strongest women in this world are often times the ones who need the most love because they have given every last drop of themselves away.
See them. Appreciate them. Be there for them.
I am an incredibly strong, powerful woman. I own this. I’ve earned both titles. Honestly, I don’t know how to be anything else. To be anything less would make me feel vulnerable, needy and incapable of handling everything life throws my way. I stand resolute in the knowledge that nothing will ever break me because I simply won’t allow it to.
I am tough. Some people love me for it, others not so much. Many rely on it and I’m okay with that.
But, what I am coming to learn as I grow older is that there is a huge price to pay for being this way. Something I never considered throughout the years of handling one crisis after another, learning life lesson after life lesson or always being the rock for those who needed me.
The cost of being the strong warrior woman – no one ever worries about you. No one ever offers to take care of you or take the time to actually see how exhausted your soul has become. The cost is in not knowing how to be vulnerable or to fully understand that having needs and being needy are two totally different things.
Hell, until recently I didn’t even know I had needs, I have always been so focused on taking care of everyone else throughout my entire life, I never took the time to worry about me. I’m the strong one, the one who doesn’t get emotional or overwhelmed. I’m the one no one has to worry about because I always have everything under control.
Except sometimes, I don’t.
Sometimes, not even remotely close. However, I am tough enough to never show it to the world and I know that eventually I will figure my own way out of feeling like this, so why bother reach out to anyone? Because I know, as any other strong warrior woman knows, we can reach out but more often than not – there isn’t anyone there.
Strong women always recognize each other. It’s in the way they carry themselves. The silent confidence that radiates from her. She commands respect without saying a word simply with her presence. She speaks her mind, stands strong in her beliefs and does not require validation from anyone other than herself. She is the woman who builds up other women and never sees the need to compete with anyone. She is who she is and she damn well knows it.
Warrior women fire me up.
Those fierce ladies the world will never break because they have the moxie, the strength and the all-out gumption to fight back, stand their ground, handle their business and take charge when no one else will step up to the plate. Who don't care about the status quo or any predefined role women are supposed to play. Who can handle any crisis and remain standing, bake cookies, dry tears, listen to someone else's pain, regardless of how bad they themselves hurt, and look damn good doing it. The women who pull their shoulders back, even when they are so loaded down with the stresses of life - to do what needs doing because, well because, it needs doing.
Strong women are incredible. They are the ones you turn to, rely on and trust with your deepest secrets and vulnerabilities. They don't judge. They don't freak out. They help you break problems down, understand them and then help you figure out solutions. They're your strength when you falter, they pick you up and dust you off when you fall, giving you a much needed pep talk to send you back out stronger than you ever thought possible.
Warrior women are champions of love, strength and fortitude. They cut through the BS and straight to the heart of situations that arise. They don't have time for rose colored glasses, as they would rather see everything clearly in black and white. They don't have time for games or trivial crap because they are too busy saving the world or at least their corner of it. This is the woman you call at midnight because your heart hurts, the one you call when a crisis arises and you need someone because you know she is always, always there for you.
She is also the one who cries in secret when no one is near. Who knows how to mask her face so that those who look upon her can’t see how lonely she is or how exhausted her entire being has become. She knows she will be forgotten when times are good, that she is the one no one ever worries about because time and time again she has proven how incredibly strong she is. Those who know her are convinced she doesn't feel fear, wallow in sadness or allow her emotions to get the better of her because she always seems to be in control - of herself, her life and her feelings. A lot of people don't even believe she has feelings or that she allows herself to have emotions. She never appears weak. She never comes across as vulnerable.
She doesn't need anyone. She's got this shit handled. Right?
Yes, she does. Of course she does. Would she admit it if she didn’t. No, probably not.
Strong women need to learn to own all of themselves. ALL. OF. THEMSELVES. Which means those messy feelings, hidden fears and desires. We must learn to bring them out into the light, make peace with them and understand we are not robots and having needs and being needy are not the same thing at all. You can still be independent, strong and an all-out warrior princess and occasionally wish someone would take care of you, see your sadness and go out of their way for you for a change. Doesn’t make you any less a kick ass woman. It makes you human.
If you know a warrior woman, if you recognize someone in these words – tell them. Do something random for them and show them they are not all alone in this world. Listen to them for a change. It will take some work but believe me, they are worth it. The strongest women in this world are often times the ones who need the most love because they have given every last drop of themselves away. See them. Appreciate them. Be there for them. Remember them when times are good, when everything is going well in your life, don’t only think of them when things go wrong. Because these women will be the one showing up at your door when you need them, they will continue to take your pain and help you carry it, they will be the one constantly sacrificing for the needs of everyone but themselves. Someone needs to see to them for who they are deep inside.
Someone needs to give them the love and attention they forget to give themselves.
To the strong, warrior women – I see you. I am you. I get it. The price we pay for being as we are is enormous but worth it. Nothing will ever break us. Just know you are not alone, even when it feels as if everyone in your world has forgotten you. You always have you. You are your own best friend and best friends take care of one another. Learn to fight for what you need and be prepared to walk away if you are in a place where your needs don't matter. You matter and it's important to finally accept this as fact. Your soul, desires and wants have to matter. Be brave enough to see that. Find the courage to see to your own soul and happiness. Because trust me, there will come a time when the shouts of your soul will become so overwhelming you won't be able to shut them out any longer. Start now and use those ass kicking warrior skills to see to you for a change. You deserve it.
And now... do what's best for you.
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