False Starts

Life is in the mistakes. Mistakes mean you are trying. Mistakes mean you are learning. If you aren't making mistakes, you aren't living. Not making mistakes means you are playing it safe and no one ever broke the chains on their soul and their dreams by walking the straight and narrow. You have to make mistakes to learn what your heart and soul crave.
 You have to get lost before you can be found.
~J.V. Manning

I took a wrong turn.

Didn't realize it at the time, thought it was a good direction to head in, and for a while, it was. Then, it wasn't. I kind of had an idea after travelling this new road for a while that perhaps it wasn't the right direction but I wanted to be sure. Then, I was. I became pretty positive life had gotten a bit turned around and instead of becoming closer to where I had intended to be, I was even further away than when I started. Shit happens. At least I figured it out pretty quick, a lot quicker than I would have a few years ago. Age and experience have taught me one thing; staying on the wrong path because you are too stubborn to admit you may have taken the wrong turn, is just a waste of time and mental energy.

Best to use that energy to recalculate, reassess and redirect yourself.

If only life came with GPS. A little voice that softly gave specific directions to get to exactly where you wanted and needed to be. A pleasant voice that spoke up when you accidentally veered a bit off track or warned you of upcoming detours and accidents. Imagine. Actually, if I were to be completely honest with myself, I would probably make turns the little voice told me not to, simply because I do not like to be told where to go in my life. Plus, you never know what you are going to find taking those random turns and chances. It could be amazing or it could be awful. Either way, it's an experience and experiences teach you. 

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I definitely learned from this wrong turn, I think that is why I had to make it. I learned just how important my dreams are. Apparently, I may not have been as committed to them as I thought I was. I am now. I learned that I’ve had enough chaos in life and I crave a peaceful environment. I learned if I am not doing the work of my soul and staying true to myself - I end up incredibly exhausted and cranky. I have also learned that I am not willing to continue on the wrong path just because it may be a bit safer than another one. I have also learned that 2014 seems to be the year of drastic changes and the key is to keep starting new things. False starts are one step closer to getting it right.

Another thing I learned - being scared of the unknown is okay, letting that fear dictate your next move - is not.

False starts are going to happen and just because it wasn't right, doesn't mean it wasn't necessary. Every single false start means you are trying. Taking courageous steps in a new direction because you want more from life than the status quo. And, while not every path you take is going to be the right one, each one of them will teach you something you didn't know when you started out. All of the lessons you learned from each false start will prepare you and help you recognize when a path you decide to take - is finally the right one.

It will happen. If you keep moving forward. Recalculating your direction every time you make a wrong turn and exploring the other paths along the way. Eventually, you will get on the right path and all the false starts and experiences you have acquired along your journey will have prepared you for it.  

Honestly, I know more now than I did before I started this particular journey. Knowledge is always good. Experience is too. You can't get so hung up on the fact that you made a mistake that you fail to see the lesson. Life is in the mistakes. Mistakes mean you are trying. Mistakes mean you are learning. If you aren't making mistakes, you aren't living. Not making mistakes means you are playing it safe and no one ever broke the chains on their soul and their dreams by walking the straight and narrow. You have to make mistakes to learn what your heart and soul crave. You have to get lost before you can be found.

You date the wrong people and then, when the right one shows up, you know. You work a bunch of different jobs, so that when you land the perfect one, you know. You love and you lose. You start and you stop. You go one way, then another. You fall down, you get back up. If you are smart, you look for the lessons in every misstep, every mistake because that is how you get that one step closer to getting it right.

You'll know when you are heading in the right direction. Something will settle inside of you, you'll feel stronger and powerful. Sure of yourself. You fight for it, when something or someone tries to change you or your mind. When you dig in and nothing anyone says or does sways you...then, it is the right direction or path for you. You will always know. Just like you will always know when something isn't working or you are heading in the wrong direction. The key though is to trust yourself enough to make the changes. Change is scary and hard but without it - life will become stagnant, unhappy and totally unfulfilling.

I don't know about you but I've worked too hard to get to where I am today to settle for anything less than amazing. I know its hard work and not everyone will understand. That's okay, they don't have too.

Recalculate, reassess, redirect and always, always restart. It's your journey, your life and totally your decision to make it epic. Get lost and change directions as many times as it takes. 

Make mistakes. Make a mess. Make the most of your life. 

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