I have found my inner bitch...and ran with her.
Bitch. Yeah I said it, or rather, wrote it. I am not ashamed of it either. As is quoted above, I have found my inner bitch, not that hard really, she isn't quiet for long. I refuse to quiet her, stick in some corner of my soul and tell her to behave. Nope. She is the side of me that is the strongest, the smartest and the one in complete control of herself. She values her judgement, makes her place in this world, and will never back down from anything. She stands tall, takes life by the balls and says, we have done it your way, now we do it mine. She is outspoken, intelligent and never allows herself to get pushed around. She stands tall and will hold anyone's gaze, because she can, because she is who she is and she doesn't care what anyone thinks about her.
We all have an inner bitch. We have just been taught that its not "lady like" to let her out. That by playing the passive, demure, quiet woman, is what is expected. Well, I have never really been quiet, sure as hell never been demure and passive, aww hell no. But it takes it toll, seriously. People like to try and make me feel bad, that standing up for what I believe in, going after what I want or taking a stand about something, is a bad thing. They call me a troublemaker, try to put me in my "place". Thing is, everyone in my life knows where I stand, that I am always there when they need me, and if something is wrong, I can be a force of nature. And I am so ok with that.
Do you have a moment in your life that you look back on and wish that you had stood your ground, stood up for yourself when no one else would? Sure, we all do, me included. Do you ask yourself, why you didn't? Why did you not trust your own voice, your own strength, you own place in this world. Why did you silence your inner bitch? Consequences, the subsequent fall out of standing firm, of putting someone in their place? This I understand, but I also understand that if something is worth fighting for, that it is all worth it. I know the first time for alot of women is the hardest. We want people to like us, often times at the expense of ourselves. But it doesn't have to be like that. I don't care if people like me, but they have to respect me. I know that some people in this world for not good reason other then because they can, will not like me. I am ok with that, chances are I wouldn't like them either. But this does not give them the right to disrespect me. Same goes for you, you must command respect, demand respect.
You can not control how the world sees you, you can however, control how you react to it. Never fear your own voice, because sometimes in life that voice is the only one that will stand up for you. Never allow anyone to belittle, demean, torment or put you in your place. You all have it in you. I know it can be scary at first, you will take some heat and be temped to run or shut her down again. But it will get easier, like the saying goes.. practice makes perfect. I am always around for pointers too.
Being a bitch isn't a bad thing. Being a bitch means you have decided to become totally in control of yourself and your life. It means that you are no longer a pushover, no longer a doormat, no longer that sweet controllable woman. The woman that allows herself to be used, lied to and put down, no longer exists. Command respect, stand up for yourself, because it is time..
It is time to release your inner bitch.
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