hurts me, angers me or that I feel disrespects me- I am in essence
giving them permission to continue.
Not OK on this stretch of road. Also not acceptable in life.
Probably when you snap.
I don't what has gotten into me lately. I think that I have hit my limit of just letting stuff go. Gasp! Did I just say that? What will people think? I may get called difficult. I may even get called bitchy. But oddly enough at this point in time, I am OK with that. What changed? No idea. Well that is not completely the truth. I have some idea. I am tired of letting things go. By letting them go and swallowing my words because it is easier than calling someone I care about out on how their behavior hurts me, angers me or that I feel disrespects me- I am in essence giving them permission to continue.
Growing up with a severely bi-polar mother, I perfected the art of placating. Of shelving what I wanted, needed or felt in order to keep the peace. Always trying to avoid the ultimate fight that would ensue if I actually stood my ground about something that mattered to me. It was easier to just let it go. I find now that I am done always placating everyone else. Sometimes it is appropriate of course. I don't need to always get my way or what I may want. But when it comes to something I feel strongly about. Or if it is something a person does over and over again even after I speak my mind- I just walk away. Completely.
The only people that deserve a place in your life are the ones that hear you, that respect you and the ones that don't force you to either swerve out of their way or risk a collision. It simply isn't worth it. I hit my limit it appears slowly over the past couple of months. If I speak up about something I feel strongly about and I am consistently disregarded by anyone- well then they do not deserve a place in my life.
I am letting go of letting go. If that makes me a difficult, opinionated and mouthy, well then I guess that just means I am doing something right. I am doing something right for me.
You should too.