Shades of Gray.

Not everything in life is black and white. Not everything is clear cut and clean. 
Life is messy. Feelings and emotions are messy. 
But it is within the shades of gray that we can reach out to others
 and find that middle ground.
 For it is within the shades of gray that peace resides. 
Where you are honored for your beliefs and truths and so am I. 
~J.V. Manning

We do not see things as they are. We see things as we are. Our truths and perspectives on situations in life may be right for us, may feel right for us, but in truth, they are simply our personal spin on it. Just because I look at the night sky and see the stars does not mean that you will look and see the same thing. You could look up at the same night sky and only see emptiness and black.  When I look at a person with multiple piercings and purple hair- I see is someone expressing their individuality. What someone else sees could be completely different. Neither of us would know the truth- the real truth. What we see is only our perception of the truth. We don't see who that person actually is only what they appear to us to be.  So snap are our judgments we rarely take the time to find out.

Life is not always black and white. 

What is right for one will not always be right for another.  We tend to see the world as we are- our past, our upbringing, our beliefs and our experiences shape how we view life and everything in it.  How we judge people, events and everything we hold to be "truth" rest solely on our very personal views. But in reality truth is relative. 

There is no universal truth- a one size fits all to any situation in life we are faced with.

You look at a situation one way and I look at it another- neither of us is wrong in our minds.  We judge situations and events on how we react to them. We often do not stop long enough to see things from any other perspective.  Rarely do we stop ourselves and study the shades of gray that permeate our existence every day.  Why would we when we are so convinced that we are right?

Life is a series of shades of gray.

People make assumptions. People make even more assumptions in the heat of the moment. Assumptions fueled by anger, sadness and moral indignation are so black and white it leaves no room for discussions. No room for communication.  It is you vs. them or me vs. you and seriously it doesn't have to be this way.  What really gets to me is when people make assumptions about my life, my actions and never ask me directly why I handled things a certain way, or reacted to something a certain way. People only see what they want to see and that is it. Black and white.

When we do not honor another's view, feeling or belief we are in essence forcing ours on them. We will argue and stand our ground for we feel we are right. And we are- for ourselves. But we can never know without a doubt- what is truth and what is right for anyone other than ourselves. There is no way to know the truth of another based solely on our perceptions. We must talk, we must ask questions and we must be open to the fact that we may never agree and that is ok. We don't have to. What we need to do is respect that fact and move on. Life is too short to be arguing. In fact if we spent less time arguing who is right and who is wrong and spending more time on developing the shades of gray into compromise think of all we could accomplish. How much hurt would be soothed in families? How many friendships would be saved? Go even further- How many tragic events in life could have been avoided if we spent more time coming together with our differences instead of splitting apart at the seams because of them. 

Be open to the shades of gray in life.

 Understand that just because you believe your version or explanation of events to be true-what you see and how you feel may not necessarily be the absolute truth for someone else. Respecting this concept could stop so much wrong in the world. Honoring one another be it family members, strangers on the street, anyone that looks out and sees a different view then you- would be amazing. We must let go of the ego. We must let go of the need to be right for everyone but ourselves. We must let go of the blame and the anger and allow others the room to be right as well.  We will not be sacrificing what we believe or what we hold to be truth as it is still right for us. But we must allow others to be right for themselves as well.

Not everything in life is black and white. Not everything is clear cut and clean. Life is messy. Feelings and emotions are messy. But it is within the shades of gray that we can reach out to others and find that middle ground. For it is within the shades of gray that peace resides. Where you are honored for your beliefs and truths and so am I.  Where black and white combine together and go forward.